A jumble of thoughts

This last week has been busy. I have been such a grump! Being tired, stressed, and overwhelmed and always feeling like I'm falling short is not good to my mood. And then I feel awful because these are the times when it would be most important if I was truly kind and Christlike and these are the times I fail! But I have the rest of my life to improve. I just have to keep trying...

I finished ICU and breathed a sigh of relief. Unfortunately, that made me forget about my post assessment, my two tests this coming week, and my hours of homework due on Tuesday... I like busy Mondays, right?

I ran the Halloween half marathon and have been in pain since. Oh my goodness I've never been this sore in my entire life! My knees kill because lots of the race was downhill, my hips are popping twice as much as usual, my calves are super sore. Even my abs and my shoulders and my neck are sore! And if you were wondering...the 6th and 12th mile felt the longest, the 13th mile was the most painful, and the 0.1 at the end almost made me cry because I just wanted to be done already! But it was still worth it. I can now say I've run a half marathon. And I'll train better next time :)

I've been asked out twice in the past week or so. Those were the first times since I started dating Taylor. Both of them were at church. I think I'm way more social at church than anywhere else. It was kind of awkward to be like-"oh, I'm dating someone." Oh well. Whatevs.

Speaking of dating someone...Taylor has been gone for the weekend to a cousin's wedding. I guess I'm a needy girlfriend but I just don't know why he's been so non-communicative. It's kind of bothered me a little. I've missed him more than I thought I would but not as much as I wished I would. Interpret that if you can.

I still have not decided about what to do about a mission. I do know that I have to make a decision on my own and then pray about it. Heavenly Father isn't going to send me a lightening bolt to tell me what to do. But I hate making decisions. I'm paralyzed with my fear of choosing the wrong path and finding out just in time. I don't want to do that again. It hurts. Lots. But I need to choose what I feel will make me the happiest and go with it. Being indecisive is the worst. And it complicates my life planning capabilities. Good thing I've never been much of a planner anyways! :)

But now it's time for bed. I need to get some sleep to help this tired, sore body of mine recover. I need to remember to be grateful and not let my confusion, my indecision, or my fear overshadow my ability to be happy. Life really is beautiful. How can I complain about having such amazing options to choose from?

13.1

Today I ran the Halloween half marathon. It was hard. I have only run once since school started. But it was awesome. Tyler (my cousin) was super nice to run it with me. He is so great :) It was freezing cold at the beginning (we started at Sundance), my shoes gave me some blisters, and whoever is in charge of this race is making way too much of a profit. I paid $70 to run it and I expected there to be lots of water stops and more food at the end, but there were only 4 water stations and oranges, bannannas, and chips at the end of the race. I know, even the Freedom Festival 5k has way more than that. But other than those complaints, I'm super glad that I did it. I wish I would have dressed up for it though! There were some sweet costumes. But now I can say that I've run a half marathon. Yes! :)

Before the race...

And when we FINISHED! 

I was very happy to be done. 

 And the medal:

Oh August

August is a good  month. I really like it. It is hot, with beautiful warm summer nights. It is the last month before school (if you take a break summer term...), and it usually consists of at least one family reunion.

This August is no different. It has been very hot here and I love it! We get to have two family reunions this August: one for just my immediate family this weekend and then one for my Dad's side of the family in a few weeks. I'm super excited for those.
There is fresh produce from the garden. Home grown tomatoes are so delicious. Especially on a melted cheese sandwich. Dang, I want one right now :)
There is usually canning and gardening and fruit picking and weeding etc.
Oh yeah, and usually everyone is getting married right about now in August. That's always exciting.


This August there is the republican convention in Tampa, Florida. I want this shirt. I'll probably buy it today. I don't usually buy shirts for things, but this is something I care so much about. Ron Paul is one of my biggest heroes :) So I am so willing to spend money to support him, because he represents the ideals and morals that I care about so much.




This August I am so much more motivated to exercise than I ever have before. I love it. Yesterday I ran three miles, did 290 crunches/situps/bikes/legs (haha, Kathy and I rotate between those 4 ab exercises), and did 26 pushups (27 is my current record). I want to train for a half marathon. I think that would be such a cool race. I don't know if I would ever want to run a full marathon, that just seems too painful. But a half would be great.

I also want abs like this:

hahaha riiiiight. Maybe someday? :)

This August I'm pretty ready for school to start. This has been a well needed break, but I'm not going to lie, I've kind of missed school. I don't know what I'll do when I'm graduated. I don't want to ever graduate! (Unless I'm married and have kids. Then I want to be done). I do hate homework, but I hate working at a quiet office for 8 hours a day even more. 

This August I'm getting my wisdom teeth out! I set up an appointment for the end of this month. Sadly it will be the first week of school, but earlier is better than later. I still need to set up an appointment to get my physical done, but after that my papers should be good to go! And then I'm goin' on a mission.  :) 

This August I want to go to the Temple more often. I want to really study my scriptures. I want to ponder lots. I want to go out and teach with the sister missionaries. I want to go on lots of hikes. I want to keep exercising until it becomes a habit. I want to strengthen friendships. I want to be more Christlike.

It's going to be a fabulous month. 

Run run as fast as you can

On Saturday I was able to volunteer at the Utah Valley Marathon in the medical tent. I loved it. I didn't do a ton of medical/nursing care (if I had been an athletic trainer it would have been more useful) but I loved seeing the runners cross the finish line. It was so inspiring!

For about two hours we stood right here, watching the runners as they came in to spot any that needed help. There were several that almost collapsed right when they crossed. We helped them walk around and then took them to the medical tent. Many just needed ice on their muscles or joints, and a few needed re-hydration. Some were very emotional as they crossed the finish line. One girl told me it was the hardest thing she had ever done. I saw several couples sprint in holding hands. I saw many older runners. I met a girl who had run a marathon the day before in Idaho and then came and ran this marathon. Insane? I would say so. Amazing? Definitely. They announced a man who was just running his 100th marathon as he crossed the finish line. 

The longest I've run in my whole entire life is a 10K race I ran with Matt and Kathy. I hadn't trained at all, but I was able to run the whole way. I've only ever been a consistent runner for about 4 months at the beginning of 2011 and I absolutely loved it. Winter 2011 was a hard semester and running was such a stress reliever/relaxer/forget what is bothering me and just run OR really good time to think about my problems in a peaceful setting. However, when I moved back home I stopped running. I tried to start running again that summer, but it was super sporadic. I tried again this last Winter semester but it only lasted about 2 weeks. So not much at all. 

But being at the finish line was so inspiring! I want to start running consistently. The origin of my motivation is probably a tie between wanting to build endurance and be tough, and wanting to have skinnier legs. I also just want to be healthy but that's not quite as motivating. Dance has been good exercise for me as well as frisbee, but neither have been consistent. Biking to school/work every day this summer will be really good exercise. But I still want to run. I'm much more motivated now than I've been for a while and I'll finally have a couple months when I'm not in school. I am going to run the Freedom 10k with Kathy, so that'll be good. 

I have one problemo...I don't really know how to train? Does anyone have good (free;) training programs that they've used? 

And here's another pet peeve list from dates/boys in general:

~ When you take a girl on a date, don't just automatically assume that she wants to be out super late. That's not very considerate or respectful. It would be nice, if you knew it was going to be late, to ask her when she needs to be home. But as a general rule 11:30 is good. Or at least before midnight. 

~If a girl doesn't want to date you, it doesn't mean you have to be a jerk.  

~Getting flowers for the first or second date is kind of awkward. It could be sweet I guess, but mostly it's just a little strange. 

~Don't be offended if you call a girl on a Wednesday night and her weekend is already full. 

Ok, I think that's all :) Off to teach a lesson for mission prep. Wahoo! 

Oh yeah, and tomorrow is the last day of school. That will be glorious :)