A jumble of thoughts

This last week has been busy. I have been such a grump! Being tired, stressed, and overwhelmed and always feeling like I'm falling short is not good to my mood. And then I feel awful because these are the times when it would be most important if I was truly kind and Christlike and these are the times I fail! But I have the rest of my life to improve. I just have to keep trying...

I finished ICU and breathed a sigh of relief. Unfortunately, that made me forget about my post assessment, my two tests this coming week, and my hours of homework due on Tuesday... I like busy Mondays, right?

I ran the Halloween half marathon and have been in pain since. Oh my goodness I've never been this sore in my entire life! My knees kill because lots of the race was downhill, my hips are popping twice as much as usual, my calves are super sore. Even my abs and my shoulders and my neck are sore! And if you were wondering...the 6th and 12th mile felt the longest, the 13th mile was the most painful, and the 0.1 at the end almost made me cry because I just wanted to be done already! But it was still worth it. I can now say I've run a half marathon. And I'll train better next time :)

I've been asked out twice in the past week or so. Those were the first times since I started dating Taylor. Both of them were at church. I think I'm way more social at church than anywhere else. It was kind of awkward to be like-"oh, I'm dating someone." Oh well. Whatevs.

Speaking of dating someone...Taylor has been gone for the weekend to a cousin's wedding. I guess I'm a needy girlfriend but I just don't know why he's been so non-communicative. It's kind of bothered me a little. I've missed him more than I thought I would but not as much as I wished I would. Interpret that if you can.

I still have not decided about what to do about a mission. I do know that I have to make a decision on my own and then pray about it. Heavenly Father isn't going to send me a lightening bolt to tell me what to do. But I hate making decisions. I'm paralyzed with my fear of choosing the wrong path and finding out just in time. I don't want to do that again. It hurts. Lots. But I need to choose what I feel will make me the happiest and go with it. Being indecisive is the worst. And it complicates my life planning capabilities. Good thing I've never been much of a planner anyways! :)

But now it's time for bed. I need to get some sleep to help this tired, sore body of mine recover. I need to remember to be grateful and not let my confusion, my indecision, or my fear overshadow my ability to be happy. Life really is beautiful. How can I complain about having such amazing options to choose from?