Not a huge fan of the music video, but I LOVE the song :)
I want to sing this to someone somday.
Although this is such a sad song, I still love it.
And Mindy Gledhill is awesome.
Showing posts with label I like. Show all posts
Showing posts with label I like. Show all posts
Friday, August 17, 2012
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Oh August
August is a good month. I really like it. It is hot, with beautiful warm summer nights. It is the last month before school (if you take a break summer term...), and it usually consists of at least one family reunion.
This August is no different. It has been very hot here and I love it! We get to have two family reunions this August: one for just my immediate family this weekend and then one for my Dad's side of the family in a few weeks. I'm super excited for those.
There is fresh produce from the garden. Home grown tomatoes are so delicious. Especially on a melted cheese sandwich. Dang, I want one right now :)
There is usually canning and gardening and fruit picking and weeding etc.
Oh yeah, and usually everyone is getting married right about now in August. That's always exciting.
This August there is the republican convention in Tampa, Florida. I want this shirt. I'll probably buy it today. I don't usually buy shirts for things, but this is something I care so much about. Ron Paul is one of my biggest heroes :) So I am so willing to spend money to support him, because he represents the ideals and morals that I care about so much.
This August I am so much more motivated to exercise than I ever have before. I love it. Yesterday I ran three miles, did 290 crunches/situps/bikes/legs (haha, Kathy and I rotate between those 4 ab exercises), and did 26 pushups (27 is my current record). I want to train for a half marathon. I think that would be such a cool race. I don't know if I would ever want to run a full marathon, that just seems too painful. But a half would be great.
I also want abs like this:
This August is no different. It has been very hot here and I love it! We get to have two family reunions this August: one for just my immediate family this weekend and then one for my Dad's side of the family in a few weeks. I'm super excited for those.
There is fresh produce from the garden. Home grown tomatoes are so delicious. Especially on a melted cheese sandwich. Dang, I want one right now :)
There is usually canning and gardening and fruit picking and weeding etc.
Oh yeah, and usually everyone is getting married right about now in August. That's always exciting.
This August there is the republican convention in Tampa, Florida. I want this shirt. I'll probably buy it today. I don't usually buy shirts for things, but this is something I care so much about. Ron Paul is one of my biggest heroes :) So I am so willing to spend money to support him, because he represents the ideals and morals that I care about so much.
This August I am so much more motivated to exercise than I ever have before. I love it. Yesterday I ran three miles, did 290 crunches/situps/bikes/legs (haha, Kathy and I rotate between those 4 ab exercises), and did 26 pushups (27 is my current record). I want to train for a half marathon. I think that would be such a cool race. I don't know if I would ever want to run a full marathon, that just seems too painful. But a half would be great.
I also want abs like this:
hahaha riiiiight. Maybe someday? :)
This August I'm pretty ready for school to start. This has been a well needed break, but I'm not going to lie, I've kind of missed school. I don't know what I'll do when I'm graduated. I don't want to ever graduate! (Unless I'm married and have kids. Then I want to be done). I do hate homework, but I hate working at a quiet office for 8 hours a day even more.
This August I'm getting my wisdom teeth out! I set up an appointment for the end of this month. Sadly it will be the first week of school, but earlier is better than later. I still need to set up an appointment to get my physical done, but after that my papers should be good to go! And then I'm goin' on a mission. :)
This August I want to go to the Temple more often. I want to really study my scriptures. I want to ponder lots. I want to go out and teach with the sister missionaries. I want to go on lots of hikes. I want to keep exercising until it becomes a habit. I want to strengthen friendships. I want to be more Christlike.
It's going to be a fabulous month.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Dancing. Again.
My favorite class this spring is definitely my ballroom class. I absolutely love it. Dancing makes me so happy! It is such a stress reliever for me. You go and you exercise and you try to be as graceful as possible, you have awesome dance partners who are super attractive (that's pretty motivating) and you learn to move with beautiful music. We are learning the waltz right now and I'm addicted. I think I've become obsessed with feeling, looking, and being graceful. Yesterday I went to dance practice at 3:00. I got home at 10:00. 7 hours of dance. No big deal...
Dancing has made me so much more motivated to be in shape! There's a goal behind it now besides just being generally healthy. (It's made me want to be like 10 pounds skinnier. I can't decide if that is okay or if that is an unhealthy motivation..). I'm definitely going to stretch every day, go running on a consistent basis, eat healthier, and do more ab workouts. Overall it has just made me want to be a stronger person.
There is just one problem with loving dance so much. It is killing me that I can't do more! This is the first ballroom class I've taken at BYU and I'm just kicking myself for not taking it sooner! I only have one year left in school, which basically means I can only take 2 more dance classes (possibly a few more if I am brave enough to squeeze them into my schedule). My TA told me I should try out for the ballroom team (he was on it most of his college career) and that I could almost for sure make it, but there is no possible way it could fit into my schedule! I've looked and looked and tried to figure out a way but it just won't work. I'm super bummed about it.
But the only thing I can do about it currently is to enjoy my class to the fullest and take every opportunity I have to practice and get better. Maybe, if I'm really blessed, I'll end up in a situation where I'm not doing nursing for a semester so I have a whole semester to just devote to GE's and dance. I'll figure out a way if there is any :)
Until then, I'm going to be stretching and exercising and practicing as much as possible. If that's the only result of this dance class, I'm happy with it.
p.s.--thank you Conner for being my dance partner! You're great and I wish you weren't leaving on your mission in the fall so we could take 280 together. Or I was going to Alaska at a different time so I could try out for the summer team with you. Oh well. Cest la vie!
p.p.s-Edit to the above post: I just re analyzed my schedule for fall and there is just a tiny chance that if I could make the 3:00 team I could fit it into my schedule. I almost just died of happiness. We'll see how this goes...
Dancing has made me so much more motivated to be in shape! There's a goal behind it now besides just being generally healthy. (It's made me want to be like 10 pounds skinnier. I can't decide if that is okay or if that is an unhealthy motivation..). I'm definitely going to stretch every day, go running on a consistent basis, eat healthier, and do more ab workouts. Overall it has just made me want to be a stronger person.
There is just one problem with loving dance so much. It is killing me that I can't do more! This is the first ballroom class I've taken at BYU and I'm just kicking myself for not taking it sooner! I only have one year left in school, which basically means I can only take 2 more dance classes (possibly a few more if I am brave enough to squeeze them into my schedule). My TA told me I should try out for the ballroom team (he was on it most of his college career) and that I could almost for sure make it, but there is no possible way it could fit into my schedule! I've looked and looked and tried to figure out a way but it just won't work. I'm super bummed about it.
But the only thing I can do about it currently is to enjoy my class to the fullest and take every opportunity I have to practice and get better. Maybe, if I'm really blessed, I'll end up in a situation where I'm not doing nursing for a semester so I have a whole semester to just devote to GE's and dance. I'll figure out a way if there is any :)
Until then, I'm going to be stretching and exercising and practicing as much as possible. If that's the only result of this dance class, I'm happy with it.
p.s.--thank you Conner for being my dance partner! You're great and I wish you weren't leaving on your mission in the fall so we could take 280 together. Or I was going to Alaska at a different time so I could try out for the summer team with you. Oh well. Cest la vie!
p.p.s-Edit to the above post: I just re analyzed my schedule for fall and there is just a tiny chance that if I could make the 3:00 team I could fit it into my schedule. I almost just died of happiness. We'll see how this goes...
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Oh what do you do during finals week?
So.... you know how finals are here? Yeah, and remember how I have 5 4 more to take? Yeah. And remember how a couple of them are going to be really hard?
Well, instead of being a good student and studying all hours of the night like I should, I got to take a couple breaks from studying and do some super cool things.
1). Kayaking. Wednesday night Kyle taught me how to Kayak. I was quite apprehensive about it seeing as I had never before done kayaking, I hate being in a swim suit, and it was going to be kind of late. However, it turned out to be one of the funnest things I've done in a long time.
I first had to learn how to get out of the kayak when I was upside down in the water. That was really scary, but after the first time it was fine (it just took me like 10 minutes to actually try it...). Then I learned how to row in a straight line (I'm still not very good at it) and after that, Kyle taught me how to roll it. By the end of the night I was able to roll over (so I was upside down under water) and then roll back up. Just by myself. It was so fun. This may have been an exaggeration, but Kyle told me I was basically in the top 1% of people learning how to kayak because I learned how to roll my first time :) I'm just a little proud of that fact ;)
2). Stunting. On Thursday night Skyler taught me how to stunt. In case you're wondering what this is, it basically is the very very basics of what a cheerleader gets to do. So I learned how to jump/get thrown up and caught up in the air, standing on someone's hands with their arms all the way extended. Basically this has been a dream I've had all my life so it was awesome to finally be able to do it. :) I also practiced a back hand spring but so far can only do it on the tramp. I freaked out a few times when we first tried, but by the end I did one that was almost good ;) I loved it, even though it was absolutely terrifying.
I woke up Thursday morning feeling sore and then Friday (after stunting) I realized what really sore meant. My muscles are still screaming at me and I feel like I'm waddling instead of walking right about now...
3). Going to Passover. On Friday night I went to Passover at BYU with Brian. It was amazing. It was a little long and the bitter herbs were the nastiest things I've ever eaten in my life, but it was such an awesome experience. I learned a lot and loved the symbolism in everything.
Don't worry, I have studied a lot. I've just taken more breaks than usual this semester. Because of this, I really need to get to work. So, cheerio, I'm off to take a peds test :)
Well, instead of being a good student and studying all hours of the night like I should, I got to take a couple breaks from studying and do some super cool things.
I first had to learn how to get out of the kayak when I was upside down in the water. That was really scary, but after the first time it was fine (it just took me like 10 minutes to actually try it...). Then I learned how to row in a straight line (I'm still not very good at it) and after that, Kyle taught me how to roll it. By the end of the night I was able to roll over (so I was upside down under water) and then roll back up. Just by myself. It was so fun. This may have been an exaggeration, but Kyle told me I was basically in the top 1% of people learning how to kayak because I learned how to roll my first time :) I'm just a little proud of that fact ;)
I woke up Thursday morning feeling sore and then Friday (after stunting) I realized what really sore meant. My muscles are still screaming at me and I feel like I'm waddling instead of walking right about now...
3). Going to Passover. On Friday night I went to Passover at BYU with Brian. It was amazing. It was a little long and the bitter herbs were the nastiest things I've ever eaten in my life, but it was such an awesome experience. I learned a lot and loved the symbolism in everything.
Don't worry, I have studied a lot. I've just taken more breaks than usual this semester. Because of this, I really need to get to work. So, cheerio, I'm off to take a peds test :)
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Bookworm
I used to be the biggest book worm. I would read all day, especially before I started high school. I would hide out in my favorite reading spots and stay there all afternoon (unless I got caught to finish my jobs). Some of those favorite places were the house roof, the old camper, sitting on the bathroom counter with my feet in the sink, the barn roof, the trampoline, and my bed. I would get so enthralled in the story that I would get cold or hot depending on the season in the book I was reading, feel happy or sad or frustrated or twitterpated along with the main characters of the book, and learn the lessons they learned. To give you a sense of how much I actually read...I read the whole 9 books of the Work and the Glory series in one week. I got quite sick of certain phrases the Gerald Lund uses, but I loved the books :)
However, since I began college I've probably read 10 (or less) non-assigned books. I've been working straight ever since the summer of 2009 and going to classes year round except summer of 2010. So Fall 2009, Winter 2010, Spring 2010, break (but still working ~35 hrs/week), Fall 2010, Winter 2011, Spring 2011, Summer 2011, Fall 2011, Winter 2012, and then Spring 2012. I've been just a touch busy. But I've realized that that is no excuse for not reading because I (obviously) spend lots of time on the internet, fb, blogs, etc. So I am going to make a book list that I can start on to read over this next summer. I don't have a ton yet, so I would love suggestions :)
Finish 1776 by David McCullough. I've started this twice and just haven't ever finished it. So I want to do that. I also have a really cool version of the book that has copies of all the famous documents/letter/maps from the revolutionary war. It's great.
To the Rescue: the biography of Thomas S. Monson. I have also started this book twice (I'm currently working on reading it right now) and really want to finish it. Even the few pages I read every couple days make me inspired to be a better person. It took me a while to like it because the writing style is very different than the biography of President Hinckley (which I LOVED) but it is definitely growing on me.
Les Miserables, by Victor Hugo. I have, once again, already started this book before but I never finished it. I've heard so many good things about this story. I know brief sections of it, and I know some of the soundtrack from the musical (and I love that) but I have never seen or read the whole thing. So I definitely want to finish this one over the summer.
Those are the three that I've been wanting to read for quite a while now. All of those are rather time consuming reading though. Any suggestions on good books that aren't quite as heavy reading?
I'm really excited to start reading again. I've been missing it in my life for a long time. I've had emphasized to me so many times in the last few weeks that life long learning is a fundamental part of being a member of the Church and that reading is one of the best ways to continue to learn. I know it helps my vocabulary, and my writing, and, obviously, my reading skills. So here's to a more literary summer! ;)
However, since I began college I've probably read 10 (or less) non-assigned books. I've been working straight ever since the summer of 2009 and going to classes year round except summer of 2010. So Fall 2009, Winter 2010, Spring 2010, break (but still working ~35 hrs/week), Fall 2010, Winter 2011, Spring 2011, Summer 2011, Fall 2011, Winter 2012, and then Spring 2012. I've been just a touch busy. But I've realized that that is no excuse for not reading because I (obviously) spend lots of time on the internet, fb, blogs, etc. So I am going to make a book list that I can start on to read over this next summer. I don't have a ton yet, so I would love suggestions :)
Finish 1776 by David McCullough. I've started this twice and just haven't ever finished it. So I want to do that. I also have a really cool version of the book that has copies of all the famous documents/letter/maps from the revolutionary war. It's great.To the Rescue: the biography of Thomas S. Monson. I have also started this book twice (I'm currently working on reading it right now) and really want to finish it. Even the few pages I read every couple days make me inspired to be a better person. It took me a while to like it because the writing style is very different than the biography of President Hinckley (which I LOVED) but it is definitely growing on me.
Les Miserables, by Victor Hugo. I have, once again, already started this book before but I never finished it. I've heard so many good things about this story. I know brief sections of it, and I know some of the soundtrack from the musical (and I love that) but I have never seen or read the whole thing. So I definitely want to finish this one over the summer.
Those are the three that I've been wanting to read for quite a while now. All of those are rather time consuming reading though. Any suggestions on good books that aren't quite as heavy reading?
I'm really excited to start reading again. I've been missing it in my life for a long time. I've had emphasized to me so many times in the last few weeks that life long learning is a fundamental part of being a member of the Church and that reading is one of the best ways to continue to learn. I know it helps my vocabulary, and my writing, and, obviously, my reading skills. So here's to a more literary summer! ;)
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
These are the moments I love:
- Walking in the door at midnight to see a plate of food, with a napkin and a fork laid neatly beside it, left just for me. My family is so thoughtful!
- Waking up my poor mother when I come home at such an unearthly hour to hear her tell me she loves me and to suddenly feel an overwhelming feeling of love for her. I have the most amazing mother in the world.
- Knowing that everything is going to work out for the best because Heavenly Father knows the whole picture.
- Hearing such beautiful, touching stories that bless my life and help me reflect upon the person I am trying to become.
- Learning again of the love of my Savior as I study His life in the New Testament.
- Walking through campus seeing (and smelling) the delicate white and pink blossoms that cover every tree and knowing the Spring has once again come to bless my life :)
Life is beautiful and I am so very blessed. Someday I will have all the answers to my life questions, but until then I am learning to enjoy the moments of uncertainty because they help me realize the things that have certainty in my life, and those things inevitably end up to be the most important.
Bon Nuit!
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Shoot!
Another long, rambling post coming up!
Today I went shooting again! And oh my goodness how I love it! :) I'm not sure why I like it so much, it is VERY tiring, I'm not a very good aim, and those shotguns have such a strong kick that I have a big bruise on my shoulder now. But I really enjoyed it. I've been shooting twice before I believe, but this was the first time I shot clay pigeons. And I hit prob 6 or 7 of them in the air. I was so proud of myself :) I want to get a gun someday. I definitely believe in the second amendment, yes indeed. (I think it's funny how many nurses completely disagree with the right to bear arms). I am very impressed with boys who can shoot really well. And somehow it makes me feel safer knowing that there are boys who own guns, who have them here while they're at college. Yeah, that makes me happy.
Here are some opinions I realized that I had today:
~I really don't like when boys give me so many options on dates. No, that's not really it. When they give me the option of going home or staying to get food. And in doing so they make it seem like I'm secretly dying and want to go home sooo bad, but I can stay if I want. I never know how to respond! I usually don't get annoyed with long dates so that doesn't bother me. And even when I know it would be good for me to get home to do homework, I have a really hard time (esp after they make it sound like I'm hating the date) saying, "yeah, I should probably get home." I just need to learn how to respond and it will be fine. In relation to choices, I just need to learn to recognize what my opinion is.
~I think it is very audacious for someone to text me this question from a number I've never seen before: "Hey when did you want to go on that date?" Um, excuse you? I have no idea who you are, I'm not in the habit of going on dates with guys who ask me out via text, and asking it like that sure makes it really seem like you want to go, NOT! Don't make it seem like someone is forcing you to ask me out. Dude. And still, who the heck are you?
~I'm definitely one of those girls who love to be urged into telling or doing something. This is embarrassing, but I realized today that it's true. When a boy asks me a question, I delay answering at first, and then he's totally fine with that, I kind of get disappointed! Classic ditzy, attention-hungry blonde, right? I need to learn to be more straightforward. Just say what I want and answer questions how I want instead of waiting to be cajoled (yes! this is the perfect word for what I'm trying to say, I love when there are words like that! :) into giving information or accepting something. I think it's kind of a fun privilege you can take when you're a girl--I'm def going to give my husband hints and he's going to have to learn to read them, but I need to stop expecting that of all boys. That's just dumb.
~I really need to come up with some good answers to this oh-so-common question: "Bekah, tell me something I don't know about you." I can NEVER think of a good answer :( Meh.
~Along the same lines--I love when guys ask me lots of specific, easy-to-answer questions. It helps me talk with them so much better. And it shows that they are more interested in talking about me than they are about telling me about them. I like it, it makes conversations go much smoother on dates. :)
~I love cooking for boys who appreciate it. Like a lot a lot. I would even make them food and drop it off at their door secretly just because it would give me such great satisfaction knowing how much they appreciate it. When boys are better at cooking than me, and love to do it, I feel a little out of place. Isn't that my job? (Oh so sexist, I know). Part of me is very impressed, but part of me is disappointed that I can't impress them with my cooking.
*MOST IMPORTANT: I just want to be friends with guys! This whole apt is so fun to hang out with! Can't we just be buddy 'ol pals? I would really appreciate that a lot more than a dating relationship right now. Can I just come hang out with you guys? Please? And don't be offended if I'm not interested in you. Why are guys incapable of this?! It is the bane of my existence right about now.
Ok, I need to go to bed now, sleep tight!
Today I went shooting again! And oh my goodness how I love it! :) I'm not sure why I like it so much, it is VERY tiring, I'm not a very good aim, and those shotguns have such a strong kick that I have a big bruise on my shoulder now. But I really enjoyed it. I've been shooting twice before I believe, but this was the first time I shot clay pigeons. And I hit prob 6 or 7 of them in the air. I was so proud of myself :) I want to get a gun someday. I definitely believe in the second amendment, yes indeed. (I think it's funny how many nurses completely disagree with the right to bear arms). I am very impressed with boys who can shoot really well. And somehow it makes me feel safer knowing that there are boys who own guns, who have them here while they're at college. Yeah, that makes me happy.
Here are some opinions I realized that I had today:
~I really don't like when boys give me so many options on dates. No, that's not really it. When they give me the option of going home or staying to get food. And in doing so they make it seem like I'm secretly dying and want to go home sooo bad, but I can stay if I want. I never know how to respond! I usually don't get annoyed with long dates so that doesn't bother me. And even when I know it would be good for me to get home to do homework, I have a really hard time (esp after they make it sound like I'm hating the date) saying, "yeah, I should probably get home." I just need to learn how to respond and it will be fine. In relation to choices, I just need to learn to recognize what my opinion is.
~I think it is very audacious for someone to text me this question from a number I've never seen before: "Hey when did you want to go on that date?" Um, excuse you? I have no idea who you are, I'm not in the habit of going on dates with guys who ask me out via text, and asking it like that sure makes it really seem like you want to go, NOT! Don't make it seem like someone is forcing you to ask me out. Dude. And still, who the heck are you?
~I'm definitely one of those girls who love to be urged into telling or doing something. This is embarrassing, but I realized today that it's true. When a boy asks me a question, I delay answering at first, and then he's totally fine with that, I kind of get disappointed! Classic ditzy, attention-hungry blonde, right? I need to learn to be more straightforward. Just say what I want and answer questions how I want instead of waiting to be cajoled (yes! this is the perfect word for what I'm trying to say, I love when there are words like that! :) into giving information or accepting something. I think it's kind of a fun privilege you can take when you're a girl--I'm def going to give my husband hints and he's going to have to learn to read them, but I need to stop expecting that of all boys. That's just dumb.
~I really need to come up with some good answers to this oh-so-common question: "Bekah, tell me something I don't know about you." I can NEVER think of a good answer :( Meh.
~Along the same lines--I love when guys ask me lots of specific, easy-to-answer questions. It helps me talk with them so much better. And it shows that they are more interested in talking about me than they are about telling me about them. I like it, it makes conversations go much smoother on dates. :)
~I love cooking for boys who appreciate it. Like a lot a lot. I would even make them food and drop it off at their door secretly just because it would give me such great satisfaction knowing how much they appreciate it. When boys are better at cooking than me, and love to do it, I feel a little out of place. Isn't that my job? (Oh so sexist, I know). Part of me is very impressed, but part of me is disappointed that I can't impress them with my cooking.
*MOST IMPORTANT: I just want to be friends with guys! This whole apt is so fun to hang out with! Can't we just be buddy 'ol pals? I would really appreciate that a lot more than a dating relationship right now. Can I just come hang out with you guys? Please? And don't be offended if I'm not interested in you. Why are guys incapable of this?! It is the bane of my existence right about now.
Ok, I need to go to bed now, sleep tight!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Well this is interesting...
I realized again today that I just don't like boys right now. But (and this is what is unusual about this discovery) I also realized that it's perfectly okay!!! Hip hip hooray! I'm fine if I don't like boys right now, it's perfectly normal (right?). Maybe I'll start liking a boy again soon, but maybe not. Maybe I need to go on a mission first, and maybe I don't. Maybe I need to do something crazy fun this summer that has absolutely NOTHING to do with boys (that hasn't happened in a very loooong time--Alaska anyone? Hopefully! ;) and once I've gotten that out of my system I'll start being interested again.
However, just to make it clear (hm hm) thinking a boy is attractive is very different than liking him. I think lots of boys are attractive and I'm impressed with many of them (and physically attracted to them as well) but I just can't get myself to like them--I've been trying and it's not working. So I'm giving up. But I'm still going to go on dates (because they're really fun) and talk about boys and joke around and flirt with them. Is that okay? I'll just make sure (with Chelle's advice) to make it obvious that I'm going on lots of dates with lots of different boys.
Well that's a relief!
Ok, this is the last post about boys for a while, I promise.
However, just to make it clear (hm hm) thinking a boy is attractive is very different than liking him. I think lots of boys are attractive and I'm impressed with many of them (and physically attracted to them as well) but I just can't get myself to like them--I've been trying and it's not working. So I'm giving up. But I'm still going to go on dates (because they're really fun) and talk about boys and joke around and flirt with them. Is that okay? I'll just make sure (with Chelle's advice) to make it obvious that I'm going on lots of dates with lots of different boys.
Well that's a relief!
Ok, this is the last post about boys for a while, I promise.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Things I love:
I love twistiness. For some strange reason it has always fascinated me.
Whether it be in rings,
hairstyles (and it includes braiding),
or nature.
In the Book of Mormon, when it talks about "curious workmanship" I always think of twisty things. It must have been twisty, right?
I love feeling kittens move inside a pregnant cat. I love that! (I love it more when it's a precious human baby, but I've felt kittens a lot more often and much more recently).
And there isn't really a picture of that. But these are cute anyway...
I love beautiful music that makes me want to join in:
I love Snow! Especially crazy snowstorms that I can watch from a window and sing one of my favorite songs ever!
There are a lot of things that I love. I could go on for a long time, but these are the things that have been on my mind this past little while. And most of all I love these people:
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Love this!
Today was HARD! When I had a breakdown before I even got to school I knew it would be a rough day. And, it was--but really, it wasn't! And this is why:
Savior, Redeemer of my soul!
Who's mighty hand has made me whole,
Whose wonderous power hath raised me up
And filled with sweet the bitter cup.
What tongue my gratitude can tell,
O gracious God of Israel.
Never can I repay Thee, Lord,
But I can love Thee. Thy pure word,
Hath it not been my one delight,
My joy by day, my dream by night?
Then let my my lips proclaim it still,
And all my life reflect Thy will
O'er-rule mine acts to serve thine ends.
Change frowning foes to smiling friends.
Chasten my soul till I shall be
Chasten my soul till I shall be
In perfect harmony with thee.
Make me more worthy of Thy love,
And fit me for the life above.
I was tired today. I was tired of trying SO hard! I was frustrated that everyone's life seems so hard right now. Why can't it just be easy? And then, talking to my Dad on the way home from school, I realized this: You can be happy no matter what your circumstance! I understood the advice that you should not be waiting for your "golden ticket" to be happy. I LOVED this advice from our beloved Pres Uchtdorf:
"So many
people today are waiting for their own golden ticket—the ticket that
they believe holds the key to the happiness they have always dreamed
about. For some, the golden ticket may be a perfect marriage; for
others, a magazine-cover home or perhaps freedom from stress or worry.
There
is nothing wrong with righteous yearnings—we hope and seek after things
that are “virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy.” The problem comes when we put our happiness on hold as we wait for some future event—our golden ticket—to appear" (Forget Me Not, President Uchtdorf).
Well, I understood that. I realized that I couldn't wait to be happily married (that was definitely MY golden ticket) to be happy. But today I realized that my other "golden ticket," the one I've really been waiting for, was to get over my temptations and fears and be the person I want to be. And today I realized that I don't have to wait for that, either! I can be happy, even though I am struggling. I can be happy because I know that the Atonement of Jesus Christ can make me whole! It will take the rest of my life, but that just gives me lots and lots of practice. This is all part of the journey.
And Oh! how I love that song! Listen to it, you won't regret it :)
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